Throughout this journey with depression I have had a few people tell me how strong I am. I've been thinking lately about what that means. I used to think it meant doing everything myself and never asking for help, never accepting help that was offered and never letting other people know when I couldn't handle things. As things got to a point where I was not able to that any more, I have had to find a new definition.
Now I can see that strength for me is more about being honest. Being honest about what I need, how I feel and how much I can do. It's about allowing myself to let others be strong for me when I can't any more. It's about accepting help, asking for help and being vulnerable. It's about letting myself be human. It's often hard for me to admit when I need help. It's hard for me to say no. It's hard for me to let others do things for me. And yet I have had to learn how to do this in order to find my way out of the dark.
In the end it means letting people into my life. This is scary for me, but also very rewarding.
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