There have been some hard things happen in my life of late. Things that require grace, respect and assertiveness on my part. Things that it seems other people don't want to accept, handle or understand. Things that in the end I know I am right about, no matter what other people want to do with it. I've been feeling out of sorts and my self-confidence has been pretty shot because of other peoples reactions of late. I've been telling myself over and over again that, that is their stuff and I am not responsible for it. But, I am struggling still with that. While I perhaps know this on some level, I am still struggling to really internalize it.
I like approval, I like people to agree, or to get what I am trying to say. When they don't, I take it personally, even when I know that I did my best and did the right thing. Guess this is a lesson for me to work on. It's really hard though. It's a habit with me. And for so long I believed that other peoples approval was all that mattered. My own thoughts on things were irrelevant. I'm starting to this isn't true, but when it comes to hard things where I really have to take a stand, I still end up feeling pretty crappy in the end.
As with so many of the things you write, I can certainly relate to this as well. It is so easy to go along with what everyone else wants or expects because that approval comes to mean so much. It is harder to go against the flow when you know you are right. But you are acting the right way now, and I approve!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the approval Keith tee hee. Seriously though, thanks for your comments.
ReplyDeleteI hear ya. I've always been envious of people who truly, sincerely, couldn't care less what other people think. There's probably a happy medium in there somewhere. Hope we all find it someday!
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