What have I been missing?

I was noticing this week that I am more and more ok with no knowing everything that is going on, not being in control so much.  This thought though made me wonder what I have been giving up in order to be in control of everything, or at least try to be.  What kind of experiences have I passed up because I didn't have the energy to take anything else in?  What have I missed by being so focussed on surviving?  I know that I can't change the past, but I hope by being different in the future I will see some of these open doors and be able to take them.